Thursday, August 21, 2008

The fight of their lives

What is it like to watch a family deal with a child who is very sick with cancer? Mind boggling. Gut wrenching. Heart breaking. Awe inspiring.  Cancer effects everyone. From the brother who is now scared to go upstairs by himself or be alone in any capacity to the other brother who waits until his mom comes home so he can safely take out his frustrations on someone who he knows will love him no matter how he acts to the little twin sister who cries for her sister in the middle of the night and constantly reminds you that her sister has an "owie" and she misses her. Even the dog  senses everything is not what it should be and takes his own nerves out on the brand new basement carpet. The mother and the father are put into a situation that nobody who hasn't lived it can even begin to imagine. Their roles as protectors have been stolen from them by a horrible disease that has no interest in playing by the rules. They have to watch their baby suffer and fight a cancer that has no predictability. A cancer that is so rare it only effects 640 children in the US a year. A cancer that has always been with their baby and decided now was the time to rear its ugly head. They have to spend day and night by their baby's side feeling helpless but hopeful and rely on their faith to pull them all through the darkest days of their lives. Most of all there is  the baby who has no idea why she is in this unfamiliar place. Why every breath is a challenge. Why there are beeps from so many machines hooked up to her tiny little body that break through her drug induced haze and send her parent's nerves through the roof. She doesn't understand why she is shaking from withdrawal and why this pain is a good thing because it is one step closer to removal of  that annoying vent. She doesn't understand that she has come so close to death and is slowly working her way back. She only knows that she hears Mommy and Daddy's voices and that they bring her more comfort than even the precious "nuk" she loves clenching  in tiny her hand.

This same family will grow in ways they never thought they could as a family. The siblings will have an even stronger bond and deeper love because they know what it is like to have their foursome disturbed.  They will be more sensitive to the plights of others and be greater people because of it. The parents will have an even stronger connection with each other because they faced their darkest hour as a team and found more support in each other than anyone else could ever offer. They will be there for anyone else who has to face a challenge like this with a the knowledge, strength, and support that only a survivor could offer. They will understand the value of every day spent with their children more than they ever have before because they have been faced with moments when it seemed like it could all be taken away. Things that used to seem like a big deal won't be such a big deal any more. Things that didn't seem like big deals before will suddenly be huge deals. Huge wonderful deals. Tuesday will survive this fight. I have seen her fight. I have felt the angels in her room. She is special. I can feel it whenever I stand near her. This child is special. She will do great things with her life.  Our prayers will be answered.

16 comments:

Shannon said...

That was very beautiful, Shar. Heartbreaking, yet inspiring & hopeful, and beautifully written. Thank you.

Bre said...

I'm left speechless. Your post was absolutely beautiful.

BoufMom9 said...

Shar,
I am just crying, crying, crying....
This was both beautiful & heart-wrenching.
You are so right.
tuesday is special and she WILL do great things.

Jenn H said...

It took me a long time to finish this, it's gut wrenching, heartbreaking, and if it hurts this much, how much more does it hurt Tuesday and her family?
God, watch over little Tuesday, comfort her as they decrease her sedation, BRING HER OFF THAT VENT AND OUT OF THE PICU!
Shar, thank you for this, I know God is watching over and holding Tuesday. She has GREAT things in store for her, the entire Whitt family has great things in store for them!!!

Christine said...

It is amazing how you find the most perfect words to describe things. Yes, Tuesday will get through this and her family will be even stronger because of it. She has the love, prayers, and support of sooooo many.

lisa said...

That was an incredible, heartbreaking read. Thank you for the tiny glimpse of what the Whitts are going through. I agree, Tuesday will get through this and the entire family will come out even more amazing than they already are.

CC said...

Beautiful Shar! As aways... I felt like I was right there with you! You have such a wonderful knack with words! Im glad you are in colorado to help support JK and her family!

Terri said...

Very beautiful Shar! Crying here as well! Thank-you so much for opeing up to us. I can't even imagine how the family is feeling! Tuesday has a lot of prayers for her, daily. He is listening!

Jane said...

Really beautiful, Shar. Thank you for giving us some perspective.

The Eadle Family said...

that was beautiful and heart wrenching. I'm sorry, I'm totally speechless.

Christy said...

Shar that was so very beautiful. I don't even know what to say. Thank you for sharing that with us. I KNOW she is going to make it I just KNOW it.

Jen B. said...

You found the most beautiful way to describe what Tuesday & her family are going through. I KNOW that God does wonderful things & I just KNOW that Tuesday will beat this. She will be the strongest, bravest little girl around & will do the most wonderful things, I'm sure of it!

Dawn Johnson said...

Can't stop the tears streaming down my face.. such a beautiful post.

Kristy said...

Shar -- Wow. I don't know what to say. Your summary of being in Colorado was so moving. I've read it a few times now. What you did for the Whitts this week was a blessing to them. Jenn said it right -- we're feeling so much pain for them and we're not even right there in it every day. Your reminder of the reality of a family fighting cancer was such a beautiful way of helping all of us understand it a bit more.

The Romero-Schroeder said...

OMG Shar that was just beautiful. THANKS

Debbie Moore said...

That was beautifully written Shar. I don't even know what to say, Thank you for sharing this with us.